The misadventures of a first time father

Tag Archives: society

Social Distance Park BenchesLike so many others attempting to keep ourselves, our loved ones, and really just anyone whether we know them or not, safe amid the current pandemic, our family has been at home and self-isolating.

Yes, irritability has been high when you’re all together in one house for such an extended period of time. It can at times feel a bit like living in a quasi-Groundhog Day loop of MTV’s The Real World. Of course, my only reference for the Real World, if I’m being honest and showing my age, is the one season I recall ever watching of the show, which was San Francisco during its initial airing in 1994. 

VHS 90s VideotapeMan, 1994. Imagine going through this type of worldwide situation those 25+ years ago. No smartphones, no streaming services, no online shopping, no internet availability, at least not as we know it today. Cable television and telephones were pretty much it. You wanted food delivery? Call for pizza or Chinese food. That was essentially it in most areas. Want to watch a movie or TV show that’s not on TV at the moment? Hope you have it on VHS (as I assume if this happened in ‘94, video stores would not have been open during the crisis).

It makes me think of just how fortunate (and I use that word incredibly loosely in this context) people are that if a worldwide crisis like this happens, that they are having it happen in the era we live, with so many luxuries at their fingertips.

And yet, despite all that, there are many who complain about being bored. Being bored! There are more than 100,000 people deceased in America as I type this and the pandemic still spreads across the land. It doesn’t end just because we get bored, by the way. It’s a virus. It’s still there. The world is available at our fingertips these days – from a phone, to a TV, to a computer. Now, let me admit up front that not everyone has that privilege of access to the web or these services. But yet, so many who complain about their boredom certainly do, and I just can’t understand it. 

What would people have done back in 1994?

Heck, let’s go back even further. Let’s take all the complaining and outrage and arguments of people who don’t care about the risk they are putting not only exposing themselves to, but so many others and let’s not transplant it 26 years ago. 

Old Radio 1940sLet’s go back to the 1940s. Let’s go back to World War II. Telephones to communicate, but maybe you were on a party line where you picked up the line along with any number of your neighbors. Better watch what you say, you never know who’s listening. You want entertainment? Pull out a book or magazine from the newsstand, turn the radio dial to what might be on at the moment. Streaming? There’s no creek around here, kid. 

Can you imagine if, during one of the most iconic times of “rallying together for the common good” throughout American history, instead of the now iconic WPA posters and messages pulling the country to sacrifice on the home front and help the overall effort, people shouted “Screw that! I’m American! I’m gonna use all the food and rubber and paper I want!” 

The landscape would certainly look very different, that’s for sure. So, why is it that even with the world at our very fingertips, there are people who just can’t seem to find it in themselves to sacrifice a little for the good of all those around them. It makes you feel that maybe they just don’t care about those around them. And I hope that’s not the case because that’s a very sad thing. 

I can’t help but feel it would have disappointed all those generations prior who had no problem making far greater sacrifices, without any of the luxuries we’re lucky to currently live with.

Perhaps a little less entitlement, and a little more gratitude and compassion for others could go a long way, not just in respect for others that we share a society in, but a great respect for those who came before us and made great sacrifices for generations to come.


I’m still reading Joseph Chilton Pearce’s “Magical Child.”

Rather than bore anyone with my attempts at a book review, I thought I’d share a slew of quotes and notes I found interesting amid the next few chapters.

Chapter 2 – Matrix Shift: Known to Unknown

“The womb offers three things to a newly forming life: a source of possibility, a source of energy to explore that possibility, and a safe place within which that exploration can take place.”

Once we have a an established bond in that matrix (the mother), a child is then ready and able to move on to to the next stage of development.

“The early child can move into an exploration of the world only by standing on the safe place provided by the mother. Later, after age seven, the child can move into the matrix of his/her own personal power only by standing on the safe place of the earth itself.”

In order to relate creatively and explore all possibilities, one has to achieve independence from the matrix. To relate fully to the mother, an infant has to leave the womb and eventually, move on from the dependency relation with the mother. After age 7, to relate fully with the world, the child must functionally separate form the world.

“Intent always precedes the ability to do; that is, during any particular stage of development, nature is preparing us for the next stage.”

“Everything is only preparatory to something else that is in formation, as day must fade to night and night to day.”

“We can force certain forms of abstraction prematurely on the child in his/her concrete stage of development, but the effects are specifically damaging (even though the damage will not be detectable for several years).

“…the newborn infant requires about eight or nine months to structure a knowledge of the mother as new matrix and move out to explore the larger matrix, earth; the child requires about seven years to structure a knowledge of the earth matrix and shift from mother as safe space to earth itself; and so on.”

If you are stressed, the baby will be stressed.

Interaction is a dynamic interchange of energy. Interaction automatically increases and enhances our safe place.

“Give the safe place for growth, the vast possibilities of the huge womb world, and the great energies of the mother’s body to call on, that tiny organism grows at an astonishing rate.”

“This interaction is the growth of intelligence and body and is the pattern our entire life should follow.”

“Research shows that the mother is the infant-child’s basis for exploration of the world itself.”

“The mother is the infant’s world…she is the infant’s power, possibility, and safe place.”

In those first eight to ten months of life, the baby has to, above all, structure a knowledge of the mother.

“Only when the infant knows that the mother matrix will not abandon him/her can that infant move into childhood with confidence and power.”

“Development then moves toward structuring a knowledge of personal power in interacting with that world matrix.”

“The biological plan is wrecked when the intent of nature is met, not with appropriate content, but with the intentions of an anxiety-driven parent and culture.”

“Anxiety results when the child is forced in mismatched relating of intent and content. Interchange with the matrix and growth of personal power then break down, but the sequential unfolding of maturation goes right ahead.”

“We must first recognize that such a plan exists…We knew about this plan when we were around six years old and a great excitement, longing, and joyful anticipation filled us. Something else happened, of course; and even as it happened, we know intuitively that it was all wrong. This primary knowing got covered up by anxiety conditioning, which was so deep and pervasive, so ingrained and so continually reinforced and amplified on every hadn that the deep knowing has been lost to us.”

“We must rekindle our knowing of a personal power that can flow with the power of all things and never be exhausted.”
Chapter 3 – Intelligence and Interaction

“Interaction is a two-way exchange of energy, with an amplification of the energy of each of the two forces.”

“Reaction is a one-way movement.”

“We always tire when energy flows out in this way. In true interaction, however, we never tire.”

“Through interaction, intelligence grows in its ability to interact. We are designed to grow and be strengthened by every event, no matter how mundane or awesome. The flow of nature and seasons, people, extreme contrasts, apparent catastrophes, pleasantries — all are experiences of interaction to be enjoyed and opportunities for learning, leading to greater ability to interact.”

“Any bodily involvement by the early child brings about a patterning in his/her brain system concerning that movement and all the sensory information related to it.”

“If repeated sufficiently…puppetlike movements…will lead to that infant’s ability to initiate and complete these movements months ahead of an infant who is not so stimulated.”

“Intelligence can only grow by moving from that which is known into that which is not yet known, from the predictable into the unpredictable.”

“When people express reaction-aggression, they are expressing not just a crippled intelligence, but what they have actually learned.”

“Growth of the infant-child’s ability to interact means increased rhythmic patterning in the brain and corresponding muscular responses. This growth can be slowed almost to a standstill by subjecting the growing child to demands inappropriate to his/her stage of development, that is, by trying to to force the child to learn or deal with information or experience suitable to a later stage of development or by keeping them locked into an earlier stage. Then the child learns that learning itself is difficult and frustrating or non-rewarding.”

“…adult idea systems and opinions, is designed for the later years for development. Forcing the early child to deal prematurely with adult abstract thought can cripple the child’s ability to think abstractly later on.”

“Direct physical contact with the world – taste, touch, even smell – are often either discouraged or actually forbidden in the parent’s anxiety over the hazards of germs and imagined threats. Without a full-dimensional world view structured in the formative years…no knowledge of physical survival can develop.”
Chapter 4 – stress and learning

“When we know the probable outcome of an event taking place around us, our body systems can remain fairly passive and relaxed.”

“We spend large part of our adult lives establishing routines that allow us to function with a minimum of sensory sampling.”

“The unknown-unpredictable imposes sensory data that do not fit the brain’s established editorial policies well enough to be handled automatically by various subordinates.”

“To enter into an unpredictable situation and accept it openly is to flow with its energy, be augmented in your own energy, and relax its tensions and stresses accordingly.”

“The periods of prenatal life, delivery, birth, and infancy are all genetically designed to provide exactly the kinds of experience needed for the brain to structure its place of power.”

“The mother is the infant’s first matrix and the source of his/her possibility.”

“If this matrix does not become fully structured, if such a security and strength are not given from birth, intelligence will have no ground on which to grow.”

“Without that safe place to stand, no energy can be utilized to explore possibility…”

“We then spend our lives trying to avoid this threat. (the unknown)”

“The person denied the first matrix remains grounded in that earliest stage, trying to establish some arbitrary and artificial safe place of his/her own making. It is a compensation that never works.”



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